THIS IS MY NEW HOUSE:

Isn't it cute?
I can't believe I just wrote that.
But I did.
Because I have turned into THAT PERSON. The person who loves her house and wants to show it off, like a baby. Isn't it cute? The person who talks about her house too much in casual conversation. "I can't believe we couldn't get the baseboard heat thermometer to work." The person who talks about the merits of "Firefly Yellow" vs. "Goldenrod Blush" over mimosas instead of...instead of what? Talking about sex? But that's what you do when you're single. I'm not single anymore. I'm in a new relationship--with my house. I have a crush on my house. No, it's worse. I AM HAVING SEX WITH MY HOUSE. And then I am TMI-ing about it. TALKING ABOUT HOW GOOD IT WAS. OR HOW BAD IT WAS. Or how unexpectedly awesome it was. Or how unexpectedly lame it was.

It's disturbing. But isn't it cute?

This is totally not what I expected would happen. I resisted buying this house with all my might. I didn't want to be tied to Boulder. I didn't want to fix my own garbage disposal. I didn't want to hear about anything that necessitated a 30-year commitment. A 30-year commitment meant I'd have to think about myself at 63 years old, and that means at some point I'm going to BE 63 years old, and that really harshed my mellow. That meant I couldn't live in denial of getting older and eventually dying. Yep. Isn't it cute.

My fiancee, on the other hand, seemed to be salivating over words like "amortization." He wanted to commit to it all--the 30 years, the DIY, the big backyard. I assumed we'd get into this house and he'd start spending all day in an apron and a toolbelt, whistling while he worked. I assumed I'D get up every morning and immediately flee the scene, bee-lining for the coffeeshop downtown and trying to feel as unrooted as possible.

Instead, I am the homebody! I can sit at my dining room table typing happily on this computer, drinking tea, from 8am until 8pm. I can spend 2 hours online looking for flokati rugs and NOT BE DONE. I can get my scintillating conversation fill for the day by talking to the Joyful Furniture lady on the phone about end tables. My fiancee will come home and say, "Have you moved?" And then the next day, when I do exactly the same thing, he'll say, "No, really, your limbs are going to atrophy."

I guess I should break it to him. I'm cheating on him with the house.

Isn't it cute?

Views: 41

Comment by Anna on November 5, 2009 at 12:41pm
Dude, this is awesome and hilarious! And I have to admit that I recognize this frame of mind. It happened to me every time I moved into a new apartment in the city. Arranging rooms, choosing colors, decorating, organizing... it became all I could think about - I would even obsess in my sleep. So I'm jealous that you get to do it for a whole house! But also acknowledge that a whole house would probably break my brain, and bank account, as well as seriously hamper any sort of "being employed" scenario. Can't wait to see your results some day!
Comment by Susan Kirby-Smith on November 7, 2009 at 5:10pm
ha ha-larious

I have been a gardening fool for over a year and would wake up and go to bed thinking about what I was going to plant where and who I wanted to see it. I feel like I've recently reached a more normalized state of loving my house but not needing to talk about it or show it to everyone, but I know what you mean. I'm still obsessed with our yard, take a little tour every morning with my coffee cup, cheering the new plants on and looking upon our weed-infested grounds with a mother's overflowing blind love.
Comment by Mari Brown on November 7, 2009 at 10:07pm
i love that both of you talked about thinking about this stuff in your sleep! yes! and again, the last time that kind of thing happened to me was when i was fantasizing about hooking up with people -- playing out elaborate scenarios.
Comment by Susan Kirby-Smith on November 8, 2009 at 10:08am
I couldn't help it....



I now measure our wealth in trees: 5 Live Oaks and 2 healthy Palm Trees. I've spent the year filling in places with flowering shrubs and groundcovers.

p.s. The snow was a freak incident meant as a Christmas present to us for our new house, the first week of December, the first year we were living here. (It hadn't snowed in 17 years or something in Louisiana and it stuck for a full four or five hours.)
Comment by Mari Brown on November 8, 2009 at 10:12pm
Nice! I like Trees as Measurement!
Comment by Alexa Scott-Flaherty on November 22, 2009 at 8:30pm
All-right! Now me too! I just realized its been 4 months now that we've been in our house! Little by little we are turning it into our special place. I love it. Changing paint colors, adding housing accessories-like jewelery. Everything is our kitchen now hangs like dangly earrings: the pot rack, the utensils, food, spices, you name it. Visible. Not hidden away in closets. Glittering. And the best is THE FEEL of the house. How the house has a personality. Built in 1929 its been here longer than us and I can feel it. How its starting to imagine its future with us. How it protects us. I wake up in the middle of the night to another presence, and its the presence of the house. We are melding.

And then there's the tree in our backyard. We named her. All summer we sat in a hammock right under her. Now she has lost her leaves and she's such a graceful lady. A silver maple.
Here's some pics. Of the house and of us making it our own.

Comment by Mari Brown on November 23, 2009 at 11:20am
I love these pictures, Alexa! Your house looks beautiful! I was immediately taken by the idea of the jewelry - it's true, it's like dressing up a person. And yes, my house, too, has a personality - I can tell when the house is a little sad, and when it's feeling its best. Your backyard looks as big as a football stadium?! Amazing?!
Comment by Alexa Scott-Flaherty on November 23, 2009 at 11:53am
It is big, but not a football stadium! Post more pics of your house! I am going to start a blog here. It's going to be about my house and about FOOD! Because now I have time to cook and bake and look at recipes and I LOVE it!
Comment by Mari Brown on November 23, 2009 at 12:08pm
i LOVE that you are doing that! yes, yes!
Comment by Susan Kirby-Smith on December 1, 2009 at 2:59pm
Cute house! Beautiful!

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